Why do I hate my friends?

 Fuck, this is stupid. I hate one of my friends and I don't like it. I just wanna be with him and with another friend who I am in on discord almost everyday of the weeks. I don't know why exactly hate him, but I know I'm just probably feeling clingy again. Sure, a friend can't be with us the entire time we live. But I still have the cling that I cannot lose. Its shitty, I know, and I feel this will destroy myself in the upcoming years. I just wanna gain peace with this friend, but I always feel he doesn't care even if he strongly actually does. I don't know how to settle this, fuck, shit, I'm gonna die.

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